5 Things
I think I’ll treat “today” flexibly — I tend to make these posts while there’s still some time remaining in the day, so the evening stuff never gets counted. So from now on, I’ll think of “day” as including the bits of the previous day that came after the 5 Things post. Five things that made me happy today/last night:
- SpeakForEquality.org: local SF activists (“some clergy, some electeds, and some other young punks like myself,” according to local activist Kip Williams, via email) have created a petition asking Speaker Nancy Pelosi to take an active leadership role in passing comprehensive civil rights legislation for GLBTQI folks. The petition will be delivered to Pelosi’s office after the health insurance reform passes. Please sign the petition, especially if you live in Pelosi’s district, and spread the word.
- I woke feeling well rested, without the headache, stomachache, and nausea that plagued me last night.
- C and I had a talk last night about him carving out time for us to spend together. It was a rational conversation, one where we listened to each other’s concerns and tried to come up with a mutually acceptable solution. I know that he has a large quantity of work to do every week, and so if we’re going to spend time together, some of that time will necessarily be spent with him doing work and me doing something else. He knows that I’m being understanding but that I would like to spend some of our time together doing stuff together: talking, hanging out, museum exhibits, walks, whatever. It was a reasonable conversation, even though I was sobbing during most of it–proof that being emotional and being rational are not mutually exclusive–and I’m happy with the way we talked through things. It’s so different from the way most conversations of this sort go, particularly with my parents. I spent the whole day feeling sick with anxiety, until I remembered that C is a reasonable, caring person, and it was highly unlikely that he would scream at me or dismiss my feelings. And he didn’t, and we’ve found a way to work things out. It gives me hope that I can break free of the constraints of nature and nurture and have a happy, functional, and honest relationship with another human being.
- C and I talked about carving persimmons like mini jack-o-lanterns!
- Death Star jack-o-lantern
21-27
Things that made me happy last Saturday: Oh, so many. Last Saturday was basically unbridled awesome, aside from the street harassment and the creepy taxi driver.
- Picked up green walnuts from the farmers market and made nocino.
- Went to the Alemany Farmers Market with W and went to Rainbow afterward, and sniffed many, many jars of herbs and spices to see what we could use for pickling. It was so much fun to throw around ideas for spice combinations.
- Many hours of pickling and experimenting with food!
L to R: Pickled jalapenos, pickled jalapenos and carrots, pickled watermelon daikon, pickled strawberries.
Things that made me happy on Sunday:
- Went to the Renegade Craft Fair (Apt Therapy) with S. So much cute and interesting stuff there, from pillows to stuffed organs to shirts to hilarious birthday cards. Lots of vintage and repurposed items. There was a stand with vinyl belts that I really liked.
- At the craft there, there was a tshirt of one of the loading cranes from Oakland’s port with a thought bubble coming out of its head and a picture of an AT-AT
- Came up with an awesome way to pack wine glasses: pad them in bras! The goblet’s bowl fits perfectly in a bra cup, and it’s cheaper than shelling out for special cardboard dividers.
Wine glasses, filled with socks and trapped in tshirts and bras!
Things that made me happy on Monday:
- Novembersnow was in town for Azkatraz, and we met up for dinner and popped down to the Mission for drinks (if only we could have Apparated! That would have been even better!). November is awesome and lovely and it was fantastic meeting her after all these years – I think we first met online back in 2002 or 2003. We talked about DanRad (who is awesome) in Equus and in HP6, Tom Felton and how awesome and leggy he looked in his black suit in HP6 (and that briefcase!), NY, living in cities, public transit, online friendships, and explaining online friends to people who are suspicious of people who make friends online (e.g. our parents), and in all, had a fantastic time.
Things that made me happy on Tuesday:
- Squared away everything related to the move: movers, permits, lease, keys. A load off of my mind.
- Called my dad and had a nice conversation with him about rock climbing, the dogs, etc.
- Baked a blueberry tart for the +1.
- Did laundry – clean sheets, warm towels straight from the dryer, clean underwear and socks, the works. My last time doing laundry at my current apartment!
Things that made me happy on Wednesday:
- I’ve been sick with a cold since Monday. On Wednesday, I beat the headache and wooziness into submission with ibuprofen. Ibuprofen is amazing! I didn’t know it worked on that kind of headache! It was great being able to walk, sit down, stand up, and turn my head without feeling like I was going to fall over.
- TOS Kirk/Spock vid to “Hot and Cold”. The song is inane (“you change your mind / like a girl changes clothes”? In my world, Katy Perry, girls AND boys change their clothes, and girls AND boys can be indecisive about what they want to wear.) but the vid is hilarious! “You’re hot” (Kirk and Spock stare deep into each other’s eyes) “and you’re cold” (cut to Kirk making out with a lady while Spock looks distraught).
- Rereading old Minimalist “101 Simple Meals” columns: … for a picnic, … for a hot summer day. I read the latter article back when I was working in Boston, and had a printout of the copy marked up with the things I wanted to try.
- :) :) :) The +1 came back. :) :) :)
- Office Depot was selling packs of 10 boxes for $14.99, and the packs were buy 2, get 1 free! I could have gotten 30 boxes! 30! for $30! I only got 10 boxes, since that’s (hopefully) more than enough to cover everything I have left to pack, but I would have had 30 boxes! And 10 boxes! That’s quite a lot.
- Slept from 9 P.M. to 7:30 the next morning. Fell asleep after cuddling, woke up around midnight, and went back to sleep. I think I ran a fever, but woke up the next morning feeling that I’d gotten through the worst of this cold.
Things that made me happy yesterday:
- Waking up with the +1. Why, hello there, sweetie!
- Come to think of it, it hasn’t taken any time to readjust to sleeping with someone again. This is nice, because when we first started spending the night together, I had a hard time sleeping through the night.
- WHEN HE WAS IN TIKAL DURING HIS VACATION, HE AND HIS FRIEND REENACTED THE SEQUENCE FROM STAR WARS IV WHERE A REBEL SCOUT LOOKS OUT OVER THE TREES OF YAVIN 4 AND MADE A VIDEO OF IT FOR ME!!!!!!!
- Made strawberry syrup to go over ice cream: macerate strawberries with sugar, then heat butter and sugar in a saucepan. Slice up the strawberries and add them and their juices to the pan, along with kirsch (optional) and a pinch of salt. Stir over medium heat to keep it from sticking to the pan and burning, and mash it up until it’s as thick as you want it to be and has turned a deep red. Toss in a pinch of curry powder and cook a little longer. Pour over ice cream.
- Skipped a concert (tickets were comp’d, anyway) to spend time with the +1. In all, it was the better choice.
Things that made me happy today:
- Take a Chance On Me TOS K/S vid (via bentseng. 3 great things: ABBA, Spock, and Kirk/Spock. The clip ends with the backrub that launched the ship to end all ships!
- I ate an Altoid, and it cleared up my stuffy, runny nose. Curiously Strong Mints indeed!
18-20
MILD SPOILERS FOR THE STAR TREK MOVIE. Things that made me happy on Wednesday:
- I did laundry! Clean, warm bedsheets are a sensual delight.
- I’M ON A SHIP! (autoplay music) I ran across it again for the first time in a while, and it’s every bit as hilarious and awesome as it was the first time I saw it. It’s a picspam Star Trek reboot parody of “I’m On A Boat.” My favorite bits:
I’M ON A SHIP!
I’M ON A SHIP MOTHERFUCKER TAKE A LOOKY HERE
STRAIGHT FLYIN THRU SPACE THE FINAL FRONTIERFUCK CANON, THIS IS ALTERNATE REALITY MOTHERFUCKER — I almost died at the line “An alternate reality” in the movie. The sound you heard was the exploding heads of thousands of fan geeks.
WELL THIS AIN’T STAR WARS, THIS IS AS TREK AS IT GETS — OMGDEDOFAWESOME
I’M ON A SHIP!
Things that made me happy on Thursday:
- W came over for dinner, which is always fun, and I made pattypan squash risotto. Pattypan squash are a revelation! I’ve never liked zucchini or anything in their family, but the whimsical flying saucer shape and the bright green and yellow coloring got me to give the pattypan a go, and they are delicious! I roasted them and folded them into the risotto, and they practically melted in my mouth.
Things that made me happy today:
- David Lebovitz posted a recipe for nocino earlier this week, and I called Alfieri farms, a local nut farm, yesterday on the off chance that green walnuts were still in season. They called back this morning while I was on my way to work and said that green walnuts were indeed in season, and they would pick some for me to pick up at the farmers market tomorrow. Score for (1) getting to know your vendors; (2) awesome farmers; (3) nocino. W and I are going to go on a Little House On the Prairie-style DIY homebrew/pickling spree tomorrow, except with more booze and jalapenos than LHOTP.
- Getting my rant on for the first time in a while.
- I’ve been struggling to manage my finances for the past few months, and have finally started getting better at it. It’s not a lot of fun, but the self-discipline it requires is good for me. I’ve brought lunch to work every day this month and it’s been two weeks since I last ate out! A small but meaningful milestone.
- The countdown until the +1 returns is under the one-week mark now. Only five days!
11-17
Things that made me happy on Wednesday:
- Dropped off my security deposit for my apartment. The final walk through, lease, and move in remain, but the place is mine! Cue a huge sigh of relief from me.
- Grocery shopping: Wednesday is 20% off coupon day at Rainbow, and I love going there and buying things in bulk. There’s something satisfying about getting just as many bay leaves as you need and hauling your own flour bin to the store to fill it up. I like looking at the shelves upon shelves of herbs and spices, which you can open up and sniff to check their freshness. It’s environmentally friendly, too, because buying things in bulk cuts down on product packaging.
Things that made me happy on Thursday:
- Fried chicken competition at Omnivore Books on Food in Noe Valley. Reasons it was awesome: 1. Hung out with Sophia for probably the first time in a month. 2. Fried chicken! 3. I love browsing at Omnivore, which features “new, antiquarian, and collectible books on food and drink.”
The winner of the fried chicken competition was skinless, boneless chicken breast cut into tenders, dredged in flour (and probably buttermilk), and deep fried in duck fat with sprigs of rosemary. None of the other entries were great, but it was fun trying them all and hanging out with a bunch of people in a cute neighborhood shop on a sunny afternoon.
I’ve had fried chicken on my mind for the last few months, after having it at Maverick and Foreign Cinema (Maverick is good but FC’s is hands down the best I’ve ever had). For Pride, I made fried chicken according to Ruth Reichl’s recipe in Tender at the Bone, which calls for soaking the chicken in buttermilk with sliced onions overnight. It was fine but not to my taste; I’m enamored of FC’s chicken and I think that they brine the chicken with various curry herbs and put curry powder in the batter. There are so many variables to consider in making the perfect fried chicken: dredge in flour or bread crumbs? Buttermilk or eggs? Alas, meat is expensive and deep frying takes a lot of effort and creates a mess. On the plus side, brining can hide many sins in meat quality, so I could skip the free range chicken and go for something cheaper if I ever get around to experimenting with fried chicken.
Things that made me happy on Friday:
- Took the train to my parents’ house and went to dinner with them and my sibling, who recently returned from a trip overseas.
- The +1 called. It was nice to hear his voice, which is distinctive. Everyone’s voice is unique, but his caught my ear from the very beginning. Its timbre is interesting, a little rough and gravelly at a higher pitch than usual for gravelly voices.
- Saw the dogs!
Things that made me happy on Saturday:
- Had a big party at my parents’ house, and saw some old friends there. Great food, too.
Things that made me happy on Sunday:
- Went to Sophia’s birthday party and caught up with some old acquaintances and met new ones. Learned about the FDA’s risk assessment requirements for drugs and medical devices, which was quite interesting.
Things that made me happy yesterday:
- Picked up my black loafers from the cobblers. I love these loafers and had worn them so much that the insoles were destroyed, the soles were worn flat, and there was a tiny hole in the leather. The cobbler fixed all of that and now I can traipse around SF in comfort! At the rate of 1 repair/year, they’ll be good for another 6 years before the cost of repairs matches the original cost of the shoes. Hopefully, they’ll last that long.
- Hark! A Vagrant: Dude Watchin’ With the Brontes reminds me of an old post of sarahtales‘:
This book reminded me of a dreadful TV show about Romantic Heroes, in which the opinion was expressed that every woman wanted to marry Heathcliff, Mr Rochester or Mr Darcy.
I took offence, both for myself and for my beloved Mr Darcy. I mean, can you imagine them all in a room together?
TV PRESENTER: Boys, would you like to talk about your interest and hobbies?
ROCHESTER: Well, there’s the compulsive lying. And then there’s the cross-dressing. [Er, there's nothing wrong with cross-dressing.]
HEATHCLIFF: I enjoy long romantic walks on the moors-
TV PRESENTER: Oh, that’s nice!
HEATHCLIFF: And then I like to round off the day by hanging a puppy.
DARCY: …
TV PRESENTER: So, do any of you have a special lady?
ROCHESTER: Well, I may have gotten the syph from my score of mistresses. And I have this illegitimate kid. And I do have a wife, but she’s crazy and in the care of a drunk, so that won’t stick.
HEATHCLIFF: Oh snap, I have a wife too! I beat her.
DARCY: I am as yet unmarried, madam.
TV PRESENTER: Thank God for that… So, uh, what would you consider your greatest, uh, fault?
ROCHESTER: Some narrow-minded fools frown on tricking defenceless girls into bigamy.
HEATHCLIFF: So I practise incestuous necrophilia. Don’t be a hater.
DARCY: Sometimes I’m a little judgemental. And aloof at parties.
TV PRESENTER: *hides behind Mr Darcy*Not that Heathcliff and Rochester aren’t fabulous characters. But there are cases in which ‘Watch out, ladies, this one can’t be tamed!’ should contain the explanatory note: ‘Because this one’s rabid.’
Things that made me happy today:
- I put down the window shades last night, so I was able to sleep without being baked and blinded by the sun this morning. (I live in the Mission. The sun is so strong here that it’s hard to see in the morning when the light comes in straight through my many windows, and my plants need to be watered every other day or they shrivel up.)
- Making a pasta al forno tonight with fresh mozzarella!
- Salsa class tonight! Dancing is fun and I always feel better after class.
10
Things that made me happy yesterday:
- W came over for dinner. We finished up the sweet potato agnolotti I made in February, when I was still living at my old apartment. I made the sage creme fraiche sauce with sage from my sage plant! Using fresh herbs that I’ve grown myself makes me happy — I feel more connected to the food somehow.
For dessert, I made shortbread, heated some blueberries, and served them with lemon pastry cream on the side. Throwing together plated desserts on a whim and with ease makes me happy, too — reading Demolition Desserts at the gym must be paying off!
Things that made me happy today:
-
An upside down picture of a cow, hills, and cloud-studded sky, with the text, "We married fudge, ice cream & brownies. Don't worry, it's legal in Vermont."
A Ben & Jerry’s ad in the BART station. It’s cheeky and funny and the bright colors and rounded, bouncy graphics lift my mood. I’m not much for ice cream, (more interested in making it than in eating it) but if I were, the amusement factor would get me to buy B&J.
I miss the +1. If all goes well, I’ll sign a lease at a new apartment tomorrow and set a firm move in date close to the end of the month. For the time being, though, I feel like I’m in limbo, waiting to move, waiting for the +1 to come home. My days are full and my planner has something penciled into it every day from last Friday to next Sunday, and still, I miss him.
6-9
Things that made me happy on Friday:
- AP was in town! We went for happy hour drinks at Cigar Bar and then went to dinner at La Mei Zi. Sadly, I was dizzy and sick; threw up at the bar; bailed in the middle of dinner; and upon arriving home, promptly ran for the bathroom and threw up everything I’d eaten that day. I am nothing if not thorough. However, when AP came to pick up her stuff from my apartment, she brought me leftovers of the fish from dinner! That was sweet of her.
- Having the day off and sleeping in until 10:30 A.M.
Things that made me happy on Saturday:
- Saw an absolutely gorgeous apartment in the morning. It literally took my breath away when I walked in!
- Got a gallon-sized ziplock of blueberries at the farmers market for $10! Having spent May making a succession of rhubarb tarts, I wanted to branch out into other summer fruit baking:
PD: How many cartons would I need for a pie? [little cartons are $2/ea]
Blueberry Seller: 6-7
PD: O_o
Blueberry Seller: {hauls out gallon-size ziplock of blueberries} Or, this is $10! You could probably make two pies with it.
PD: I’ll take it!The ziplock was full of reject blueberries: the overripe, the underripe, the squashed, the bestemmed. I wouldn’t use them for a dessert in which their natural flavor is the star, but they’re fine for boiling with sugar, lemon juice, and lemon zest, and putting into a tart.
- Went to a barbecue with some old high school acquaintances. It was fun seeing them again and it was nice to know that I could hang out with people I didn’t know well without being awkward. We had views of fireworks all over the East Bay.
- The +1 called from Guatemala. I missed the call, but he left a message, and it was nice to hear his voice.
- Sibling came home from vacation. Picked him up from the airport (where ‘picked up’ means ‘BARTed to SFO’ and ‘cabbed home’), fed him, and heard all about his adventures in Germany.
Things that made me happy on Sunday:
- Sibling finished off the batch of dumplings I made in April. I was afraid they’d linger in my freezer forever! Now, I have room in the freezer for the chicken and beef stock I made this weekend.
- Made the lemon cream from the Tartine cookbook, and filled a blueberry tart with it.
- Went to another barbecue at Sahiya’s neighbors’ place, and had fun relaxing and hanging out with them. The white barbecues I’ve been to are very different from my parents’ barbecues, in terms of the food.
- Made basmati rice according to the recipe in Madhur Jaffrey’s book on Indian cooking, and it turned out well! It’s the first time I’ve made palatable basmati rice.
Things that made me happy today:
- After debating between two apartments for the entire weekend, I went to sign the lease on the first one I’d seen and liked, only to find out that I preferred the apartment I’d seen on Saturday. This is a happy item, though–I made up my mind to take the Saturday apartment, and I’m dropping off an application tomorrow. Cross your fingers for me! The place is simply gorgeous and literally took my breath away when I saw it. I can’t believe it’s still on the market, let alone for what the landlord’s asking for it.
- Woke up early this morning to cook lentils for lunch. They were tasty, if not mouth-wateringly delicious, and it’s enough to be going on with. I want to replicate the awesome lentil curry that Shalimar serves, which I would happily eat for lunch for a week straight.
4-5
Things that made me happy yesterday:
- I gave notice at my current abode. When I got off the phone with the roommate whose name is actually on the lease, I felt free and light, as if I could fly. For reasons why I am feeling this way, see here
- I saw an apartment that I liked a great deal and not 15 minutes after I’d filled out an application and left, the landlord called and said that I could have the place. Cue some dithering about whether I really did like the place, whether Alamo Square would be a better place to live than Nob Hill, how much not having laundry in the building really mattered, etc. But in the main, I was excited. The kitchen’s adorable, all my furniture can fit in the apartment comfortably (minus the bed frame, which I want to dispose of anyway)
- Walking from an open house in Hayes Valley to an open house in Alamo Square, I saw this sign:
A street sign for Friendship Ct.
- The wonders of modern technology: the +1 called me using the Skype app on his iTouch, which was picking up a wireless signal from the bus he was riding to the airport. When I answered the Skype call, I found out that my laptop had a built-in microphone, and basically talked at my laptop while lying in bed. I remember when AIM first integrated voice chat, back in 2000 or 2001: LN and I were chatting over AIM, my laptop was plugged into a 56k dial up connection, and LN had to stick an actual microphone into her computer. I didn’t have a mike with the right size jack for my laptop, so she talked and I IMed back. I didn’t have a cell phone back then, and the reception at my house was terrible, too. We’ve come a long way since then!
Things that made me happy today:
- Realizing that I’m moving and that I’m done with apartment hunting. And I only had to see six places, too. SCORE.
- The +1 is flying back to SF in a few weeks, and I’ve been thinking about taking the afternoon off from work to meet him at the airport. Speaking as someone who’s flown a lot; is rarely met at the airport; and is usually a little envious of the happy reunions between family and friends at the arrivals terminal, I thought it would be nice to say, “Welcome back,” at SFO instead of giving him my new address and telling him to ring the buzzer when he gets there. AP is revolted by such schmoopy sentimentality, so I upped the ante:
PD: so i was thinking when [the +1] gets into SFO
PD: i should bring flowers, right?
PD: bc that’s what people do when they meet their significant other after time apart, right?
AP: I’m going to stop talking to you now,
AP: As I am eating with sandy
AP: And you are making me puke
PD: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA - Sleeping for eight hours and feeling rested when I woke up this morning.
- I got a new kind of granola for my morning yogurt, and it’s crunchy, nutty, and subtly honey-sweet.
1-3
Things that made me happy on Sunday:
- The Pride parade: there were so many fantastic people in the parade, from new, local grassroots groups to more established organizations. Many of the local politicians were there, including my district supervisor, and I had fun seeing which politicians were marching with which groups (e.g. Mirkarimi, one of the most progressive members of the Board of Supervisors, had the Green Party in his entourage). I had a blast watching the floats and dancing on the sidewalk. Dykes on Bikes (and motorini) kicked ass.
- SH’s beaded necklace, which looks like Mardi Gras beads, but the beads are heart-shaped! WK’s beaded necklace, from the Chipotle Pride contingent, was red and had a shiny red chili pepper on it!
- Going to Baker Beach with SH and WK and napping in the sun without getting sunburned.
- When the +1 and I were talking about my search for a new apartment, he said, “i’m excited for loud sex.” A person after my own heart! Moreover, the sex we have is good: we delight in each other. It isn’t something that is done to me or that I do to him.
Things that made me happy yesterday:
- AP, who is broke, and I, who am struggling to balance finances, were arguing about going out for dinner when she visits next weekend.
AP: clubbing/drinking heavily on friday
PD: have fun!
AP: um with YOU dumbass
AP: shalimaaaaaaaaaar? la mei zi?????????
PD: $$$$$$$$$$$$?
AP: oh *blinks *
PD: HEY, YOU TOO! $$$!!!!
AP: :(
PD: what is this ‘i have credit card debt’ ‘let’s go out’?!
AP: dude this is one a month!
AP: FINE let’s fucking buy a bottle of vodka from costco and drink it at your house!That last line cracks me up every time I look at it. It’s a ridiculous picture–we’re not going to sit around getting trashed in my crappy apartment when she comes to SF–but at the same time, it’s sincere: we’ll have fun hanging out together, because what matters is spending time being ridiculous together, whether it’s eating stinky tofu and ChiCKEN wInGS in FLaMIng hOt OiL!! at la mei zi or eating Indian take out straight from the carton and drinking gin straight from the bottle in her half-packed apartment.
- Reading Home-Made Beverages, an anonymous book by A Practical Brewer, published in 1919. It has recipes for beer, cordial, liqueur, and many alcoholic liquids. I especially liked the step by step directions for brewing beer.
Things that made me happy today:
- Reading Elizabeth Falkner’s Demolition Desserts while running at the gym. Running at the gym is good because exercise helps my mood, sleeping patterns, and overall fitness. Reading DD is good because it stays open by itself on the treadmill and Falkner’s approach to desserts is intriguing. It’s a dessert cookbook that’s as well written as my favorite savory cookbooks, and that’s rare. Good savory cookbooks are easy to find but good dessert cookbooks are much thinner on the ground.
- Writing this post and smiling at the good times I’ve had in the past few days with my friends.
